Things I’ve Learned In My First Year.


Your happiness is not invincible. Though you may feel the brightest, most concentrated bliss you have ever known, something will eventually knock on your door to knock you down; happiness is a cycle and to believe we can ever reach a peak of it is to live in a fool’s chimera. Learn to accept the ebb and flow of things, or the lows will paralyze you. Nothing in nature blooms all year long, and neither will you.



You will be faced with the most and least free time you’ve ever had, simultaneously. It’s overwhelmingly liberating, but you have to learn to balance it. Productivity kills procrastination.



Sleep is not an extracurricular. Your body is constantly fighting to keep you functioning, healthy, and alive, so treat it with the respect and dignity it deserves. Allow yourself 7-8 uninterupted hours of sleep each night to recharge, or your body will eventually give in. It’s better to show up to an exam fully rested with only half your notes memorized than sleep deprived with none of the content actually retained.



Growth is constantly happening. People never stop changing with the weather and you will never be one certain version of yourself; identity fluctuates with the wind. The second you pinpoint who you are in one exact moment, that version of you shifts and changes. Accept and embrace this flow of growth; it’s inevitable and entirely beautiful if you allow it to be.



Vaccuuming should really be a weekly activity, especially when living with three other women. (Hair. You find it everywhere.)



People are not permanant and you can’t force a temporary soul to stay. There will be people who enter your life to teach you compassion or calculus, to show you what it is to feel truly trusted or bare and vulnerable. There will be people who you regret with every waking ounce of you, but you need to understand that you wouldn’t have irises blooming from your back had their knife not fertalized the soil in your spine. You will find people who you want to stay around forever, but you need to learn that losing them may be the beginning of a personal revolution.



Stagnation is the same as falling behind.



Understand that your friends first semester might not be as close during the second; you’re in a part of your life where people are changing and growing at a faster and more significant rate than they ever have. This is normal and healthy, so don’t blame yourself or them, but understand that it does happen.



You don’t owe anyone anything.



People may say they know what they’re doing and they might be incredibly convincing, but I promise you that nobody has any clue where their life is really going. Everybody is just aimlessly walking towards a vague idea of the future, never truly having any sort of grasp on the concept thereof. Your roommate is just as lost as your professor as the cashier as the RA as you. We all just get a little better at pretending we know the route.



Don’t accept guilt and blame for your mental health, or lack thereof,  but do understand that it will affect those around you. They haven’t seen your quiet winters and don’t know how to speak to you under stress, so have patience and speak up.



Never let anyone convince you that the fault lays entirely in your hands while the blood is staining theirs. They will see your compassion and exploit it. Avoiding conflict for the sake of peace and false resolutions will only anchor you to drown; you were given a voice and passionate veins, so use them.



Learn the love languages of those around you. Know that your idea of closeness may be quality time while your best friend’s may be affirmation. Things will get lost in translation when you don’t know how to speak to one another’s hearts.



Say no to things you don’t want to do and don’t feel guilty for it. You are in school for you and the betterment of your future, so don’t sacrifice your well being to please somebody else. Don’t feel guility for staying in to study rather than going to some random person’s basement with 100 people you don’t know.



You will never truly learn from anything until you are ready to.

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